Friday, June 8, 2012

Imperfect Timing | Life Unsweetened

imperfect timing

My sixth article for LA Family Magazine?s ?Life After College? section went up earlier this week. I decided to write about my relationships pre-college, during college and after college- and the one thing they all had in common.

You can read, comment and share my article by clicking here?or read all of my past articles for the magazine over?here.

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Imperfect Timing

When it comes to my love life, there seems to be a pattern. This pattern isn?t the type of guy I date or the length of the relationship, but the terrible timing that my boyfriends and I begin dating.

I started dating my first serious boyfriend the summer I graduated from high school- right before I was set to begin?college. He was well aware I was heading off to a school 2 hours away to pursue my education, and we both agreed that we wanted to continue dating despite the distance.

I would be lying if I said doing the whole long-distance thing was easy. My boyfriend at the time didn?t go to college (he worked full-time and lived in our hometown) and also didn?t have access to a car. He came to visit a few times with the help of a friend, and I saw him on college breaks and long weekends. It certainly wasn?t ideal, but we made it work for the time being.

While my close friends were supportive of my long-distance relationship, the majority of people weren?t as supportive. I was so sick of everyone asking ?Do you actually think a long-distance relationship is going to work in college??

That relationship lasted for a little over 3 years (on-and-off, in typical LDR tradition). Although it ended pretty badly my senior year of college, I can at least say I learned a thing or two about dating long-distance and make far better decisions now.

As the number on the ?Days to Graduation? countdown clock became fewer, I became closer with one of my friends at college, James. This was the end of my senior year of college and I certainly wasn?t looking for a serious relationship- especially with my last long-distance relationship not working out and the uncertainty of my post-college living situation. But in the typical pattern I mentioned earlier, James and I began dating despite the odd timing.

So I once again entered into the world of long-distance, but with more knowledge and a clearer head than the last time. Living almost 3 hours from each other is hard, but we plan visits a few times a month and talk every day to make it work.

I?ve learned from these experiences that although the timing and the circumstance may not be ?perfect,? really great things can still come from them. I think that James came into my life at?just?the right time, and I?m so thankful it happened when and how it did.

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